unironic, by mr. jason

unironic: An old man turned ninety-eight
He won the lottery and died the next day
ironic: An old man turned ninety-eight outliving his doctor who
gave him six months to live 35 years ago

unironic: It's a death row pardon, two minutes too late
ironic: It's killing your wife for cheating on you, because you saw
her with another guy, who turns out to be a second cousin
visiting for the day

unironic: It's like rain on your wedding day
ironic: It's like filing for divorce on your anniversary

unironic: It's a free ride when you've already paid
ironic: It's crashing your car the day before you start a job
with a long commute

unironic: It's the good advice that you just didn't take
ironic: It's getting divorced when you write a lovelorn advice column

unironic: Mr. Play It Safe was afraid to fly
He packed his suitcase and kissed his kids good-bye
He waited his whole damn life to take that flight
And as the plane crashed down he thought
"Well, isn't this nice...."
ironic: Mr. Public Relations Flack for an airline who has
vouched for the safety of this plane based on pure
greed crashes down with Mr. Play it Safe

unironic:: A traffic jam when you're already late
ironic: A traffic jam when you're the chairman of the Department of
Transportation driving to give a speech on the lack of
congestion on the roads

unironic: A No Smoking sign on your cigarette break
ironic: The Marlboro Man dying of cancer

unironic: It's like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife
ironic: It's like an order for ten thousand spoons after you leave
the spoon business for lack of success

unironic: It's meeting the man of my dreams
and then meeting his beautiful wife
IRONIC: It's meeting the man of my dreams
and then meeting his boyfriend

and isn't ironic... don't you think

by Mr. Jason

ROTFL

well you see, life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
when you think everything's okay and everything's going right